The word GOODBYE led scrolled my eye. Just when you thought everything is so damn perfect, just when you thought you have encountered too much pain and problems & nothing can bring you down... everything is just a thought... REALITY is never that, real word is a big surprise, its a trigger waiting to be pulled. GUNSHOT!
I am questioning myself... how can I continue now? My life became so routinary... a planted journal... 2 years of being a ventriloquist puppet. Its about time to regain my skeleton and be able to stand on my own.
I've learned a lot.. but learning stops here.. learning stop when it starts to hurt. I am emotionally wreck, physically tired but I can feel the sudden relief... I am still alive. I am not blaming my misfortune on you, never I consider it is... but to continue with you is what I believe is misfortune, to me and to you. I've seen the sign and I had your permission and acceptance... thank you for letting me borrow your wings before you push me off the clif.
Its ironic that we already have the solution but the formula is missing. I was loved, been taken care of, was never betrayed but deprived. When jealousy is present, heart turns to wood. When there is envy, there is competition. Happiness should not be bounded within two souls but binded souls must be shared with great hope and good foundation of trust. We are too busy finding the key, without us knowing that the door is open.
Nothing of you can help me heal all the wounds, not even a piece so I am begging. This is not easy... this is the hardest decision of my life, the most popular the happiest and the most bleeding one. Maybe the pain that I am feeling now is just a dot on what you are experiencing.. I am SORRY. Like a shout at the top of my lungs. THANK YOU, words that i will not fail to say every passing day, for being a part of my life and for all the memorie shared. I might regret this, but I might regret not doing this as well. Someone has to give in, someone needs to sacrifice. Our partnership had to much carbon, Oxygen is what we need.
Nobody Dies a VIRGIN. LIFE & LOVE fuck's us all.
Disclaimer: my words are authentic, but I don't know how far I could sustain it.
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